Happy anniversary hubbylove.....!!!!!!!!


today was the anniversary bust sadly he gotta work like mad.. since morning till now... but its okie... no matter wad happen i still love him as who he is.. and i always do adore him all the time...
So today didnt do much just help dad to retouch the kitchen and den met up with paula and hang out with her abit :D damn she is a nice girl over all... :) so after that went amk to meet with my beloved para to get the application form from her to paula.. :D...... hmmm so after that went to wdls to talk alot at SB den headed to banquet paula and her friend was famish... so while they have the dinner i get myself a dessert tau suan hhehe.... nice slurrppp.... but overall i love my day... :D












I'm staring out in the sky
Hoping for a sign
Maybe I was high
I can't get you out of my mind

Your words are my treasure
No wise men can measure
My heart hurt to beat
If it's you I cannot meet

I wanted to see you
I wanted to hold you
I wanted to kiss you
I wanted to make you my everything

Please, let me love you
Don't care about what they say
Just let me stay
Let me be the one for you

I have none to offer you
Just my heart and soul
Always at your side loving you
Hoping for someday to be with you

I want to ease your pain
As you shielded me
I want to share my dreams to you
A I dreamed of your face

You say I am special
But you are the real deal
That my heart cannot conceal
For you are the the key

You break my barrier
With your sacred touch
A proud wolf
Brave to fight the monsters within me

Your song
Warms my frozen heart
a sweet revelation
That freed my jaded soul

Love is pure
Now i know it's true identity
From one itself is pure
Indeed, the one I want to share my reality

I want to be your shelter
To keep you warm in cold
To put my arms around you
Keeping you safe in my hold

I want to show you
How much I love you
But, much too scared
To let my feelings show

Please, don't look at me
with so much kindness in your eyes
This feeling
Would juts intensified my being

You say that you know me
Oh, how I long to hear those words
I never thought, you'd say that to me
I guess, you somehow like me then

I am a locked diary
To others
But an open book
To your clear sight

They say tears are for the weak
But you didn't consider me as one
You didn't know how much I want to thank you
But I know its isn't enough

Whenever I am down
You're always there lifting me up
Kissing away my tears
And giving me peace

I never knew love before
But it's you who showed me
It's you who love me
And that is all i needed

You always made me
Love myself
For that I know
Your love for me is pure



norman daniel,
i Love you as who u are not wad u are for... and i have been always wanting to say that i always do love u personally but my mouth could say so.. :)

love u hubbylove... happy 7th aamonthsary:)

Before I met you
I no longer felt new
Every day, I felt sad and blue.
I no longer felt strong,
And in this world, I felt I didn't belong.
I never wanted to go outside,
Just wanted to crawl and hide.
Not wanting to show my face,
In my room was the only safe place.
When I felt empty inside,
At times I wanted to do the unthinkable-suicide.

Now that I've met you,
I thank God for giving me the chance to survive.
Because now I'm still alive.
Though I may not be perfect to the world,
In your eyes, I'm your perfect girl.
I want to love you for the rest of my life,
And I hope that someday you will ask me to beeome your wife.

As I sit here trying to write the words,
Instnatly, the words appear smudged and blurred.
Baby, you have given me sp many reasons to smile,
A smile so beautiful that you say you can see for miles.
When I'm with you, I'm always falling into the
Arms of your embrace, and it's always the perfect place.
Please don't feel sorry for me.
Instead, lift me up, make love to me,
And make me feel carefree!

No longer are my day's sad and blue,
Because baby I'm so in love with you.
So in closing of this poem...these tears I'm crying are
not tears from hitting a lucky seven,
Baby, these tears I'm crying are tears from God in heaven.


There no point of me taking charge of anything.
Cause in every relationship we should believe and trust one another.
Its just not me by controlling or asking the person to follow my pace.
As i know life have different pace for each individual like us.
But do not misuse the trust that have within.
Cause it will ended up upsetting the other partner.
and leading to miscommunication and misunderstanding to one another.
Trust me when such things happen the other partner will feel damn sober and mellow.
As they always think that the are never good enough for you.
Eventhough life is full of give and take, certain time we got to be selfish
and thinking about the happiness that been wanted.

so without you that lighten up there no one else will be.
hubbylove, i love you as for u are and changing to its hard for me as no one is perfect in the world. But i trusted with all my heart and never want the same thing would happen again. regardless whether its a friend but for once u gotta think of my feelings and eventhough i can seem to be anything goes. Yet i do have feeling ayte... i love so much till since morning tear never run dry. It shattered me so much.... eventhough it might be minor to you but its major to me.... So yeah...



I love you norman daniel.
the only man that i love so much.
and i was given a chance to do tattoo i do ur name on it.

hubbylove I love you
and i promise to stay true
as long as you do too.

You're the light that brightens my days,
before i met you my life seemed like a maze.
you guided my way out of the maze
and showed me that love should
never be a phase.

I'm glad I have you in my life
and I'm lucky enough to be your wife.
all I ask is for you to never leave my sight
because i truly love you with all my heart, soul, and might.






This feeling with in
its new
its different

when surrounded by you
I'm out of control

my emotions run free
and wild

Ive always been loved
but never truly loved back

it came to a shock when noticing how
you really make me feel

i cant help but kiss you every time you turn
to me

hug you every time your near

because my emotions are running free

the love i feel for you
makes me feel incredible & indescribable


always love me
for i will always love you

Wow without realise been days i never blog.. hmm firstly was kinda buys with my life.. and last week busy attending cuz sulastrina engagement. and yeah life pretty great just that few up and down... I really changed to different person.. cause i care less about me but kept worrying about hubbylove... and he really change me to a better person.. im not the old nazria who just love party and late nite.... drinking smoking and manymore.... apart from that i have been always home.... i seldom out unless needed.. seriously... i just do not know why la...

Finally i made the blog by myself.. nothing much to change just lil here and there... :D

Trust is important in every relationship
Without it relationship wont go on smooth..
No matter how bad the past haunt
Yet have to fight and give the current partner a chance to prove...

Just wanna say that i Love You always...
And i opened it alot.. and making me say to you personally most of the time :D

Im such a happy girl made payment for both my kimono dress and hubbylove metal mulisha cap... goshh.. it was pleased but yet i still have doubt paying for my kimono.. as i feel so bad that everytime i want to purchase hubbylove would pay them sigh... im really hopping to get the job at ttsh and hopefully they call real soon.. cant wait to get my arse to work... im bored and tired to stay home most of the day... stillin my ass out at comp.. and hurry to november as dip will start.. okok.. lately i feel to worn out.. no idea why.. guess i need to start to tann as my skin getting fairer... no.. i dun want to be fair... as most girl is dying to be fair im not.. aduuh... i love bronze i love tanneed... i dun like those pink blusher neither i like my skin tone to be white.. hmmm btw lately i have not enough time for hubbylove is not that im busy.. but he is.. almost most night he will be back home ard midnight so by then he is tired and wanting to sleep.. .so usual we will take about daily life for almost an hour den off we go to bed.. den at 6 he will get himself ready to work.. while i will just have the beauty sleep :D but yeah.. eventhough i have those sleep but yet to talk and have those conversation... damn... reason of him workin like mad just to help me get wadever i want and to school i mean in diploma... yeah.. btw i miss my bestie shima, bestie para and my GF/Bfs... miss them to the core... and to my cousin erika when are we hitting the beach i need to sun tanned.. hehe.. i just miss spending most time with hubbylove... or shall i just surprise him on a dine in dinner at some restaurant... hmmm where shall i bring him to dine.. btw soon gonna be our 7th monthsary and hoping that he gets his off day... this sunday is cousin sulastrina engagement day... boring old me have very limited top to wear for this kinda occasion hehe...

sigh... i still do not know if i would spit out to my mom n dad abt sch... bet me they gonna scream like hell... but at least this time with a valid reason.. its not that im quitting for fun... sighh.. but at least im enrolling myself in BMC back too.. its not as though as i quit and i dun have any back up.... sighh.... hmmm bet they are okie with me taking accouting...

Practically hubbylove was on standby and i could not sleep till late dawn.... sigh.. now im having minor migrane... sigh.. hate when i think to much and lack of sleep... why... i do have this things before.. why now.... do i have to learn spit it out wad im keepin all this while.. but i just dunnoe why is it so hard for me to let out everysingle thing... apart from that i will tend say im fine or okie.. or tell them otherwise... damn.. i hate lying but i have to cause im always afraid that i will hurt or make people feel weird... nevermind one fine day i shall learn how to tell wad have been hiding deep under...

btw here im waiting for my hubbylove to come home so that we could have dinner together.. mom cook ayam cili padi... as dad is away we finally can eat something spicy.... btw i just made payment for hubbylove metal mulisha cap tat he always wanted... :)

Hmm sunday was kinda morning wake up day for me.. as mom and dad woke me up as early as 8 to fetch my lil angel from bro place... As usual bro want to have date with sis in law lol.. okok... so fetch her and she was sitting with me at the back... damn she is putting on weight already... can feel the heaviness in her :) so yeah... once home fed her and change her diapers as she shitt... damn i hate it... so yeah... after with hubbylove fetch me to take me out :) so leaving his bag and uniform at home... we head to city hall... and yesh we were searching for our best nike slippers high and low.. when i found them they dun have my size... sigh.. wen im in love it the slipper no size aduhh.. hmm den we head to quiksliver over at Marina Square as we want to have lunch over at the food court upstairs.. so went there get this slippers and yes its on promotion buy 1 get another free.. :) and again i have additional discount from my friend apissss :) how happy that boy could be hehe.. okok.. den after we head home ard 7 plus as mom told me to be home causing wanting to send lil emily home... and sis in law and bro was home too they are from town... :P den after sending the 3 of them at cck we head to marsiling to eat satay with mom and dad... sighh... was kinda tiring day for me and hubbylove.. :) and yeah finally hubbylove agreed for the race.. damn im looking forward to see him race.. :) 2 mth time :) as abg yan said....


Smiling away :)


emilly


hmm?


She is learning to turn :)


She is sleepy


argghh...


she was about to sleep

saat ini tatap mataku
Adakah kesungguhan di sana kau dapati
Seerat mungkin kau genggam tanganku
Dan rasakan kehadiranku untukmu

Cintaku bukan cinta sempurna
Tapi cukup hati ini kau miliki

Demikianlah luasnya hatiku sayang
Disanalah raga jiwa kupersembahkan

Kau jadi bagian hidupku
Saat ini dan kuharap juga esok nanti
Berharaplah kita selalu bersama
Di dalam cinta dan juga duka nestapa

Ingin kuhabiskan sisa hidup ini
Berdua selamanya
Ini sebuah cita cinta
Semoga bukan mimpi di siang hari
Atau kasih yang tak sampai...


weee.. finally after week of trying to put the pharse in malay i finally get them... hahak.. been to long las i wrote something like this... damn i got to polish it back ;)...
Hubbylove is working ryte now... can i just say im too addicted to him and now he use my fav perfume of all.. clinque happy weee.... i just love the smell and tend to smell him every now and den.. hehe.. but yeah.. eventhough me and him doesnt go out that much... like other couples do... but i rather be it this way... as i gotta study my o level still :)... still in a search of job.. but hopefully i get the one at ttsh :) with my sec.sch bestie paraa.... wee.. miss her manage to meet her the other time damn it... i think there is so much more to catch :) ..... here im at home with belo sis who is sleeping nothing to do... im just like next taitai but i dun want to be a taitai... so boring... hmm okie la shall end them here.. ")

Noone knows how soft i can be.. As my aggressive look and sport like girl.. no one know that the soft side of me is always hidden.. i never tend to even show them out unless needed... Without realising soon me and hubbylove gonna be 7 mth and end of the year will be our first year together.. damn time fly so fast... but im always have the thinking that im always never good enough for him... I just do not know why do i always have this feelings... I was thought that i have not give the love that he is searching for... siggh.... I got to break this thru.. i dun want anything happening... But with the support of everyone and him been loved by the family have been delighted for me.. even mom and dad if he didnt come home they will ask if he would come home... hmm i love this boy and i want to spend my life with him... and i want him to be the father of my children.... :)

Sadness i have to leave all the dream behind and fall on the other... Yes, i have skin problem in which i cant hold any chemical handling in school.... Without noticing it i had the problem eversince in ite bukit batok.. but i breakthru it and goin for accounting course instead... its okie i have my bestie shima to help me and teach me alot of things... she have been a guidance to me.. eventhough that effing misunderstanding quarrels jealousy and stuff.. but we still be strong in friendship... and yeah hubbylove is also the person always be by myside whenever i need him... thru the crying and stuff trust me.... He is a love... goshh... hmm... btw yeah today he is on 24hrs shifts... and i hate it so much... i can only meet me tmrw night as in midnight... damn it.. for sunday i do not know if we could even go out.. btw yeah i want to buy famous amos cookies im so craving it... hmm shall update more tonight.. :P

I dont mind not having expensive gifts
I dont need them either.
I just want that smile for you all the time
The inner person of you...
I just want you to walk out of the previous life and walk a new with me.
No matter what the person whom i need to guide me is you
and the person that i truely love is you....
I just dont want thing or feeling that is hidden between us.
I just wanna stick with you all the time
I just do not know what else or to elaborate..
As i know no one is perfect...
Even a item that is so accurate can have error on it..
Boy, you know you worth much more that the precious diamond that every woman dream of.
I just want you to breakaway the past...

I want to kiss your pain away
i seek to shine your rainy day
i want you forever , to be mine
i want to get drunk from your wine

and babe every time i think of you
i feel the world is mine for true
and passion that belongs to you
starts to burn & fuse my pew

oh ! every time you reach my mind
i turn senseless and , i twist blind
i feel unbalanced & going to fall
reach my mind ! & i wont feel at all

i want to kiss your pain away
i seek to shine your rainy day
i want you forever , to be mine
i want to get drunk from your wine

Mightily ! i desire to hug you
to see the world through your hue
to touch the hand of your soul
to hear your bell when it tolls

and baby all i want from this world
is to hear from you one single word
just let me hear when you say i love you
and i swear i feel i owned the world for true

How can i denied that i dont love u at all..
I always do love you...
They way u cared and showed me how you love me...
Those bad sleep that i have, the sickness that im facing the allergy that im facing, that school i want to go... gosh
Now i feel weird nights without you here...
mayb cause im always used to have u here..
To scold and nagg for not scratcthing those rashes part, To tell me everysingle night to eat my medication as you i will skipped them as when i like, and applied for me the cream before goin to bed.... You tolerate with the moodswings and stuff... when im at home... the tears that i hold back cause of the problem at home.. damn i miss those just cant wait to see you tmrw evening.. can i just fast forward time... :) hmmm i miss you hubbylove... you have been always here to support me all this while.. ;)


btw cant wait for you to make decission on the race and which sponser will you be with... eventually i will be there to support you too.... I just want to see you race on that dirt... i dont mind sacrified the time just for you to train.. :) and i hope and wish that you make a wise decission... :)

looking for new job. gosh damn it so hard to get a job here in singapore btw tmrw is amber dayout day... gosh im looking forward to it... Gonna bring her out while the daddy gonna look for his shoes.. :) and mummy still on shopping mode hehee.. btw i just bid a smocked tube black maxi dress online... damn its simple but easy to wear out :) but still im gonna save the money half for KL and another half is for VS clothes... and yes im gotta be learn to be more femmine... I bought alot of dress but never wear till hubbylove said i bought them for tayang in the wardbrobe hehehe.... but now im gonna get some stuff like unusual stuff online... me and bf have been always search for metal mulisha things damn its nice.. and i love them thanks to him.. btw he was offered for race but he still considering.. hubby go ahead and join i would love to see you race :) with the suit and stuff awww.. hehehe omg im so feeling.. btw i love him so much and i cant afford to not meet him for aday... today he is coming home and cant wait for him to come.. btw yeah today mom is sick so i went to NTUC and buy chix,celery and carrot for chicken soup slurrrppp.... so cookking dem later and yeah hope hubby come home early to help me... btw i gonna send resume as im gonna start new work soon.. maiden bra hehehe cool im working at bra shop now hehehehe den no worries as i always see girls... and i wont be that bad for my bf too... :) im askin idah to join me there tooo... hehhe den we can work together2.. .hehe okie la i wanna clean my room again as tmrw emily and amber will be here cool... love love this 2 lil monster.. the are super adorable till i wont want to let them go oonce cuddle :)

Here is back date picture of my lil nipote that mean lil niece in italian.... She call me Zia rya and hubbylove zio daniel while she call my sis Tia eera and my elder bro obek :).... she calls my parent oma and opa. while call her parent ibu ayah... isnt that great.. ;) she is only weeks old yet she is behaving like 3mths babies... Theres also picture of me and hubbylove on wed during dinner at pizza hut and today while he parked dad cars :)





When i grow up i want to be model


Smiling went ayah and ibu were talking to her.


Amelia aka Emily with Kaka


See how strong she is


She even hold her own bottle



Read the jumper. :)



Hubby parking the van


Pose for the cam? ;)


Tis is actual him parking ;)


When she is 2days old



IM hungry and he is angry :P


Happy us when drumstick came


During the day.


love driving?


When i say he cant park properly :)




Her full name NUR AMELIA AHMAD NIZAM
aka. EMILY

Sleeping on her zia...


took when she sleep


hungry hubby :P

In the mist of the night,
Two lovers walk along the beach.
As they continue to walk,
The sand caresses their feet.

It's just the two of them,
Spending an enchanting evening in each other's arms.
Hoping to never let go -
of the perpetual love they share.

As the sweet whispers of the waves,
Send shivers up their spines...
The ocean remains persistent -
up-and-down, up-and-down.

As they apotheosize the beautiful horizon,
They exchange passionate kisses.
It is then that the ceaseless affection proliferates -
amidst the two souls like never before...

Like the rising tide, beating hearts grow but never die.




Where is the place,
Where all makes sense?
Is there such a place?
Ah, yes
It's in the soft look upon your face

Where is the place,
Where i don't have to hide?
Is there a place where I don't have to wear a disguise?
In you is where it lies

It's in your heart
In you I know that I am loved
It's your love
With you I am never alone

This place you can never know,
Unless you're falling in love
It's no physical, visible place
You can't find it on a map
It's in his heart

Im glad that i found someone that really pamper me and tolerate with all the things that i always craving for... hmm for info i dont usually shop every mth unless like the usual things like make up and my every needs.. apart from that for clothes and stuff.. i only bought it like every 3 mth or so once... that one also like for the mth itself i could spend like 300++ but that all... it worth to buy with so many bag ;).... hmmm Practically im looking for a new job as i kinda dun like the workin enviroment.... hmm soon gonna replace... gosh.. im still thinking if i should work at bodyshop,Club21,Fjbenjamin, as a part time tutor or back to starbucks.. goshh im so confuse... Btw i miss all my gfs.. the outing.. and many more... i really need to get back to study and learn how to juggle things.. hmm... gosh... hmm btw this few week i having pms to the core.. i dont even spare a thought to hubbylove feelings but eventhough he will tell me off... BY the end of the day, the person who always tuck me to sleep everynight is him..... I always fall to deep sleep and he will tuck me in and kiss me for the last time before he go to bed... i just miss those moment like i was a lil girl.. as i grow older i dont get them from my parent.. and now its him who doing it again.. i just love and will eventually fall to deep sleep peacefully... Seeing him almost everyday make me closer and wanting to stay with him forever... :) btw he really have stole the precious heart of mine and always making me loving him every single bits :)

weee im a happy girl now... bought alot of things today.. practically first went hunting for the gladiator sandal which i found them in far east and cost 24 only... den get my nike mary jane love love them so much thanks to hubbylove comment :) and bought make up at galleria sephora...nice make up... but gosh tell u something the bronzer super big can use for 6 mth u noe... hehehe but i love this.... cant wait for the online shop things... gosh tell u.. that im so in love with those that i want to buy... okok.. i maybe not the lil girl who runs with dresses every wear... im a a girl with its own mindset... hehehe.. i love to wear something that im comfortable weee....